(AP Photo/Jeff Roberson)
What the hell is everyone making such a big deal about? Back-to-back one hitters? Like that’s hard to do. The Padres have thrown 25 one hitters. See? Easy. And guess what… if that appeal works out, his first game one hitter will be a no-hitter which means he won’t have back-to-back anything. Oh, you throw a knuckleball, R.A.? I can throw a knuckleball. Probably even slower than you can. Initials as your name? B.P. here… what’s up now? You got a beard. So what. I can grow a beard without even trying. You’re 37 years old and throwing one hitters like it’s going out of style. That’s not old. You’re only 3 years older than Kerry Wood… who just retired. So you’ve got zero earned runs, 39 strikeouts and only 2 walks in the past 32 2/3 innings pitched. I’m sure that’s been done before. So just calm down, New York… there are real pitchers in your city… one in particular that is worthy of your praise.
Not guilty, bitches!!! Totally innocent. Here’s a shot of Clemens leaving the courtroom.
-bp