2 Free Farmers Insurance Open Tickets for This Weekend

Ok, Showman’s got two free tickets to the Farmers Open, can be used Saturday or Sunday. Who gets ‘em? Easy. Who’s the funniest? To the comment section.

Contest: Tickets will go to whoever can make us laugh the hardest in 20 words or less. If you go over, no dice. You have until 2pm today. No other rules. Be creative. Be funny.

Must use your real email address so we can contact you, and you have to be able to pick them up from Showman in UTC between 2pm-5pm PST today, or in PB between 5pm-2am. Ay-oh!

Reeeeeeeeeady, GO.

**CONTEST is up… well done… our winner is Jimmy Bats who simply wrote “What is ‘donkey’?” Brilliant. He was, of course, referring to this… which makes me die laughing every time I think about it. Look out for an email from Showman for the tix. Loved “Vijay Singh” too… that was a close second.**


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45 Responses to 2 Free Farmers Insurance Open Tickets for This Weekend

  1. Van Diesel says:

    I smell varmint poontang, and the only good varmint poontang is dead varmint poontang, I think.

  2. The Black Pearl says:

    What do you call 5 black guys on a boat heading east?

    A good start

    (It’s ok, cause I’m black)

  3. BigBallinBrett says:

    Van Diesels joke is to funny as a Diaper is to a baby

  4. Gamvito says:

    Black Pearl’s disqualified. I’m is a contraction for ‘I am.’ That puts you at 21 words home-boy.

    (see what I did with the home-boy/black reference? ah ha ha ha that’s funny)… oh crap, it’s not okay… I’m not black :-/

  5. Caster says:

    great, a contest where the winner gets to fight traffic and parking in order to hang out with a humanity crush of golf enthusiasts. it’s barely even a sport. holler when you have spare PBA tour event tickets, douche. and yes, that bowling pun was deliberate.

  6. Body. says:

    Vijay Singh.

  7. Herm says:

    Cops come to door, “your wife has been hit by bus.”
    “I know”, man says, “but she has great personality.”

  8. Herm says:

    I don’t usually slap bitches,
    but when i do,
    i use my dick.

  9. Jonsey says:

    im with caster. if i caught myself at a golf tourney id kick my own ass

  10. Crew says:

    Man goes to doctor for physical.
    Doc: “You have to stop masturbating.”
    Man: “Why?”
    Doc: “I’m trying to examine you.”

  11. The Black Pearl says:

    Nice Caster, Can’t think of anything funny to say, so you just bag on the whole contest. You are pretty creative there pal.

    • Caster says:

      Disappointingly uncreative, for sure. Next contest, i’m going to be original and hilarious and optimistic. i’m going to win 1st prize, and i’m not going to share it with you because you’re mean.

  12. Jimmy Bats says:

    What is “donkey”?

  13. JBaker says:

    How am I supposed to yell “mashed potatoes” at Tiger if he’s in Dubai?

  14. Teddy KGB says:

    Wear the fox hat!

    (anybody… anybody?)

  15. BP says:

    The Dodgers are a good baseball team

  16. #1 Feminist says:

    Women’s rights.

  17. slappy says:

    good work putting a stupid piglet up… i’d like to punt it like that nice man did to the kitten.

  18. dante says:

    do the two free tix come with a free ride on those gay paragliders?

  19. J dot says:

    Who’s Showman?

  20. harry says:

    radio? who needs a radio?

  21. sal says:

    that skirt is very becoming on you. i know if i was on you, i’d be….
    pissed i read this post.

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