ANIMAL MASCOTS THAT MUST BE BANNED! (& those they will offend)

So, you read about the Utah high school that rejected the mascot name “Cougars” for fear “it could be seen as offensive to older women.” I noted that if we stand for this… there’s a ton of animals we need to put on watch. So, here goes…

ANIMAL MASCOTS THAT MUST BE BANNED & THOSE THEY WILL OFFEND:

Honey Badgers – People who don’t give a sh*t.

Beavers – Half the world’s population.

Whales – Fat female beach-goers

Rats – Liars.

Foxes – Hot chicks

Walrus – Khloe Kardashian

Giraffe – Malcolm Floyd

Clams – Sweaty hands people

Shrimp – Little people

Butterflies – The French

Frogs – Also the French

Pink Flamingos – The French again.

Anteaters – The Uncircumcised

Dogs – Friends everywhere.

Crabs – You know.

Bald Eagle – Bald guys…or girls.

Llamas – Pau Gasol

Weasels – Sneaky people.

Wolves – Team Jacob.

Cheetahs: Adulterers in Boston

If you don’t understand that last one… just give a few to resonate, it’ll come to you. I’m sure we missed some… feel free to share.

-bp

[thanks to caster, mac, body and king for their contributions]

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8 Responses to ANIMAL MASCOTS THAT MUST BE BANNED! (& those they will offend)

  1. Michael says:

    “Honey Badgers – People who don’t give a sh*t.”

    By definition, these people won’t be offended by this mascot because they don’t give a sh*t.

  2. showman says:

    Horses – Shannon Sharpe

    Silverback Gorillas – Tommy Gibbs

    Anteaters – Asians

  3. Jonsey says:

    Unicorns — BP
    Sloths — SHOWMAN

  4. Moff says:

    Whew… I think the UC Santa Cruz Banana Slugs are still safe… was worried about losing that one.

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