The Only Thing Crazier Than Naming Your Kid “Blue Ivy”… Are the Name Origin Speculations on the Internet

As a father to a 2-year-old and an 8-week-old, I’m no stranger to baby names. It’s a tough decision… you’re responsible for what another human is gonna be called for the rest of their life. Lotta pressure. That said, this whole business of celebrities trying to be unique? Give it a rest. Blue Ivy is a joke of a name. But whatever, it’s Jay-Z and Beyonce… so it’s to be expected, but holy crap, look at what the idiot/conspiracy theorists of the internet have come up with for the origin of the name…

Us Weekly reports that fans of Jay-Z say the rapper has made it clear that the color blue is special to him. “My favorite hue is Jay-Z blue,” he rapped on the track “Go Crazy” with Young Jeezy, and then there are his albums titled “Blueprint,” “Blueprint 2″ and “The Blueprint 3″ — plus he once dated singer, Blu Cantrell. That’s a lot of blue in his life.

This is where it starts getting weird:

What about Ivy? The Internet speculates that Ivy references the Roman numeral “IV” representing the number four, which is apparently significant to Beyonce and Jay-Z — Beyonce’s birthday is Sept. 4, Jay-Z’s is Dec. 4, the couple was married on April 4, 2008 and the Beyonce’s latest album is entitled “4.”

This is where it crosses over to insane:

There are also some more bizarre theories surrounding the name. There’s the crazy theory that Blue Ivy is an anagram for the name “Eulb Yvi,” which some have claimed is Latin for “Lucifer’s daughter” or that Blue stands for “Born Living Under Evil” and “Ivy” stands for “Illuminati’s Very Youngest.” All of these ridiculous theories of course stem back to equally ridiculous rumors that Jay-Z and Beyonce are members of a secret satanic cult called the Illuminati.

Good grief… the world is getting dumber.

I’ve known for years that Jay-Z was Illuminati, btw. He has this tattooed on his ass.

Now flip your computer over…woah! woooooooah… thanks for nothing, Dan Brown.

-bp

[lobbed by The Incredible Fulk]

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