Got a Hernia? Grab a Butterknife!

The Sac Bee – A Southern California man stuck a butter knife into his belly in a failed bid at self-surgery to remove a painful hernia, police said Tuesday.

The wife of the 63-year-old Glendale man called 911 on Sunday night and told the emergency operator her husband was using a knife to remove a protruding hernia, Sgt. Tom Lorenz said.

“She said he had impaled himself with a knife,” Lorenz said.

A hernia occurs when all or part of an organ or fatty tissue squeezes through a hole or a weak spot in a surrounding muscle or connective tissue. While the man said he was trying to remove a hernia, hernias are normally repaired by doctors in a hospital or medical setting involving some type of procedure to push the organ back in.

Officers found the man naked on a patio lounge chair outside his apartment with a 6-inch butter knife sticking out of his stomach.

I want everyone to visualize that last sentence for me. Just amazing. I really just love that things still amaze me when I see them on the internet. They shouldn’t, but they do. I’ve had a hernia before, so I think I find this much more comical than most. I love the idea that there’s a human out there that thinks you can fix a hernia by removing “it” with anything… let alone a butter knife. That “it”… is your intestines, bro. Naked on patio lounge chair with a butter knife sticking out of your stomach? I can’t stop laughing.

-bp

[lobbed by The Body!]

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2 Responses to Got a Hernia? Grab a Butterknife!

  1. Sanch says:

    This gent is clearly not the sharpest tool in the shed

  2. Cree-dub the Herniated says:

    And here I’ve been using my finger like a sucker.

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